You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
