I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
