Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Randomize
