So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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