i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
nutella sex= disaster
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
