I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
