I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
