ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
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Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
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