Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize