did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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