its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
