You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
