ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
