I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize