You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
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i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
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