you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
