dude i'm inner monologue high
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
