she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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