This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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