so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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