she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
