yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize