last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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