Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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