I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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