what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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