After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
