This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
