Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
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