love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize