dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
