Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
it's great music for shaving your balls
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
the raccoons are back...
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