Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
