How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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