nut hugger
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
vagina is talking i cant
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
