Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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