Where are you?
In a non slutty way
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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