Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
