It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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