last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
