Texts From Last Night

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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation

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  (504): I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation http://tfl.nu/lbqv
  Replies (22) Good night (1489) Bad night (3220)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex

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  (978): i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex http://tfl.nu/k76b
  Replies (5) Good night (4113) Bad night (842)
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  (831): View more from California

  Don't EVER smell your tampon

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  (831): Don't EVER smell your tampon http://tfl.nu/zvwb
  Replies (89) Good night (1398) Bad night (19570)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?

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  (814): Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects? http://tfl.nu/389h
  Replies (35) Good night (2354) Bad night (864)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...

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  (318): you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back... http://tfl.nu/qoth
  Replies (7) Good night (711) Bad night (2756)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.

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  (412): We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you. http://tfl.nu/7kee
  Replies (2) Good night (1181) Bad night (558)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Does that work!! Please say yes

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  (702): Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons (702): Does that work!! Please say yes http://tfl.nu/ujrg
  Replies (24) Good night (770) Bad night (2115)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.

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  (573): He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady. http://tfl.nu/txg0
  Replies (6) Good night (2503) Bad night (540)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now

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  (604): yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now http://tfl.nu/b5id
  Replies (8) Good night (461) Bad night (1063)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.

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  (845): It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother. http://tfl.nu/ow2i
  Replies (8) Good night (1522) Bad night (650)
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  (607): View more from New York

  The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"

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  (607): The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??" http://tfl.nu/clw8
  Replies (4) Good night (1473) Bad night (408)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma

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  (931): I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma http://tfl.nu/5uqx
  Replies (7) Good night (453) Bad night (910)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"

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  (303): Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!" http://tfl.nu/4c9h
  Replies (4) Good night (741) Bad night (314)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home

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  (503): Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home http://tfl.nu/qybd
  Replies (5) Good night (460) Bad night (362)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.

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  (508): You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment. http://tfl.nu/adm1
  Replies (0) Good night (272) Bad night (381)

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