Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
What a dumb baby whore.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize
