absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
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