I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
She announced her abortion via fbk
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I have feelings that need drinking.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
