he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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