JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
