that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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