One girl and one boy is just not enough.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
