Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
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