So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
This is classic penis vs brain.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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