Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
